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Published on:

28th Jun 2017

Sex Spoken Here: Pervertables and Other Interesting Toys 016

Welcome to my virtual therapy room!  I am Dr Lori Beth Bisbey and this is Sex Spoken Here. Remember that this podcast deals with adult themes so if you don’t have privacy you might wish to put on your headphones.

Today I am continuing my series on sex toys. So far in this series, I looked at vibrators and vibrating toys, dildos and butt plugs, and talked with Chrystal Bougon of Curvy Girl and Bliss.  If you haven’t had the opportunity to listen to the first three episodes in the series, I encourage you to do so. 

Today, I am talking about pervertables and other interesting toys.  A pervertable is an ordinary item that can be turned to sexual or perverted purposes.    Later in the show I will talk about electro-stimulation toys.  The first question I usually get about pervertables is why bother?  There are a few reasons:

The first is if you are not sure if you will enjoy certain types of sensation or activities, you probably don’t want to invest money in the toys or items.  For example, you want to try a toy that will produce a thud type sensation, and see if you enjoy that type of pain mixed pleasure.  You could go out and buy different paddles or you could go into the kitchen and get a wooden spoon or use the back of a heavy hair brush.

The second reason is that you don’t have lots of money to spend.  This is the most common reason someone decides to explore pervertables and creating their own toys.

The third is the associations we form with items that we will see every day can add some excitement and on-going turn on.  For example, if you have children or live with parents or roommates, you won’t keep that gorgeous flogger out and so you won’t get the thrill of seeing it regularly.    But, if your lover uses a belt instead, every time you see the belt, every time they wear the belt, you will get an intense thrill.  It can be like being hot-wired: You are doing something ordinary and you see the belt and suddenly you are soaked or rock hard or both.

Pervertables for sensory play and sensory deprivation play:

Sensory deprivation can increase the sensation for the senses that are still available.    It also adds the extra thrill of surprise.  The mildest form of sensory deprivation (and the most common) is blindfolding.  Blindfolds can be made from ties, towels, shirts, belts, strips of fabric.  One of the most arousing scenes I ever took part in, my lover tore off my t-shirt and cut it into strips, using one to blindfold me and the others to tie my hands to the bed posts.

Your underwear can be used as a gag.   

Sensory play involves using all our senses and different types of sensation to increase excitement.  Sometimes sight is removed (as many of us rely on sight as a primary sense).    Alternate textures can be used to stimulate and enflame.  There are tons of pervertables in the home that are ideal for this type of play.

You can use sandpaper, the edge of tweezers, a feather, a fan, the tines of a fork, leather gloves, silk gloves or fabric, a safety pin, a rubber band.  Using smells is also enlightening.  In this case, I recommend pleasant smells and smells that whet the appetite like vanilla, cinnamon, chocolate, musk, civet, labdanum, leather, tuberose, amber, or gardenia. 

Taste is also a lot of fun to play with.  I recommend using fresh fruit, chocolate, olives, lemon or lime, fresh ginger and for the truly adventurous various chilli peppers.  Ginger can be used for figging which is when it is peeled and inserted in either the vagina or anus.  It will cause an intense burning sensation.  It shouldn’t be left in for too long.  Some people also use chilli for this but I don’t recommend it because it is too hard to remove.  Please make sure you aren’t allergic to anything you are going to put on or in your body.

What about pervertables for dildos?  There are loads of things you can use that are insertable pervertables.  Please use common sense before putting something up your coochie or ass.  Make sure that it isn’t going to cause damage – so make sure it is clean, use condoms, lots of lube, and nothing too sharp! (Even if you like pain, shredding your insides is never advised).    Warnings finished.  You can use carrots, zucchini (courgettes), candles.

If you want to try some forms of BDSM and kink, there are lots of pervertables you can find at home or at B&Q or Home Depot.    For restraints, ribbon can be used.  Ribbon can feel cutting though so make sure to pay attention to how you feel and make sure the person who has tied you with it is checking in with you about how you feel.  Any time you use restraints you must take care not to cut off circulation by tying too tight.  You can use various sizes of chain for restraints.  You can use regular rope but this tends to chafe.  Try using rope over some fabric (like a sock or a tie) in order to avoid chafing. 

Nipple stimulation can be sensual or intense.  If you want to experience some of the intense, clothespins are great pervertables.   They may seem easy at first.  The real hurt comes when they are taken off and all the blood rushes back into the nipples.   Chopsticks can be used to tap on the nipples.

For impact toys, you have incredible choices all throughout the house.  In the office, rulers make great impact toys.  They can also be easily integrated into a role play scene.  My first piano teacher used to hit my hand with a ruler when I didn’t play correctly.   School role plays can include being spanked with a ruler.

Spoons are great impact toys.  You can use wooden, plastic or metal and they will each give you a different sensation.    You can use spatulas as well.   Try a long-handled shoe horn (wooden ones are the best).   Belts (the end without the buckle) are old standards for a good spanking.    The back of a brush or a shoe are ones that many people in their 40’s and older experienced when they were children and naughty.

If you want a more challenging sensation, a beating with the business end of a hair brush is pretty challenging.    Rubber bands are very challenging.  How do you use them, you ask?  Just like when you were kids, you snap them on someone.   The worst places to have them snapped on you are predictably the most sensitive places.  Rubber bands look really innocuous but they are NOT. 

Remember that using different fabrics and textures all over your body can be really arousing.  Alternating textures raises excitement.  For example, using something furry over the breasts and following that with light scratching with finger nails. 

Playing with temperature is also lots of fun with pervertables.  Paraffin candles are perfect for wax play.  If you’ve never done it before, do get some instruction (either in person or on line) so that no one gets burned.  Ice cubes are fantastic for raising your temperature.  They can be rubbed lightly over the body or held tightly to the juicy parts.

Electro-stimulation toys are finally more affordable.  Electrostimulation or e-sex involves the applying of electrical stimulation to the nerves for sexual pleasure.    If you use a pace maker, please don’t try this.  If you have heart conditions, this is not recommended.    And it is not advisable to place electrodes so that current passes through the chest cavity as even at low current and low voltage there is a risk of cardiac problems.   Having said this, if you are using a violet wand these warnings don’t apply.   If you are going to try this, it is best to get some instruction so you know all the risks, hazards and the best techniques.  OK, warnings over.

The use of electricity for entertainment dates back to the 1740’s.  In the 1830’s insertable electrodes were first designed.  In the 1920, some electrostimulation devices were used as a ‘cure’ for impotence.    In the 1950s, a EMS machine that was designed for relaxation was re-purposed and used for sexual stimulation. That was an advanced pervertable!.  

Violet rays were developed for various medical treatments in the 1920’s and 30’s.   From there they went to the beauty community and some treatments originally derived from violet ray use still exist today.    Edgar Cayce found metaphysical uses for these devices and they found popularity again in the 60’s and 70’s. 

The original repurposed units are TENS and EMS units.  Erotic units began to be devised in the 1980s.  Battery powered units are preferred as they reduce the likelihood of injury.

Violet wands are modified telsa coil type electrical transformer.  It is usually engineered specifically for sexual play.  The electrode attachments are made of glass or plastic and they glow when the electricity passes through them.  The most common colour is purple hence the violet in the name but there are lots of different colours you can find.  There is a phallic shaped electrode made for insertion and this has a fine spray output versus the long slim tube which concentrates into larger single sparks.  Some electrodes feel tickly, others like a gentle tingling, others a bit more spicy and some very intense. 

There are a wide variety of techniques you can employ using these devices.  Some allow you to electrify yourself and use your fingertips to be the contact point.  So you can stroke your partner with a finger that gives them little sparks as you stroke.  There are floggers and canes that can be electrified through your hand so you can add that extra spice to the flogging. 

Violet wands are lower amperage than other electro stimulation toys and therefore are the safest.  They can be used above the waist without fear.  There are so many different sensations produced by these making them a great toy to use long term,  More information can be found from the International Violet Wand Guild – violetwands.org.

Are there pervertables you have used that you found really sexy or are there things I haven’t mentioned that you find smokin’ hot?  Tweet me @drbisbey or post a picture on Instagram where I am also drbisbey.   Tell me about your violet wands or other electromagnetic play.  Or you can drop me an email at drbisbey@the-intimacy-coach.com.   If you want some more details on using the pervertables in this podcast, you can get the workbook to accompany the series by emailing me.

Thanks for joining me for Sex Spoken Here with Dr Lori Beth Bisbey.

Write to me with suggestions for the show, questions you want answered at drbisbey@the-intimacy-coach.com, follow me on twitter, Instagram and Facebook..  Check out my YouTube channel: Dr Lori Beth Bisbey.  For a free 30-minute strategy session with me, go to www.the-intimacy-coach.com and click the button that says Schedule Now!  I look forward to seeing you next week.

 

 

 

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About the Podcast

Sex Spoken Here
Sex Spoken Here Podcast
Welcome to Sex Spoken Here with Dr Lori Beth Bisbey! Welcoming to my virtual therapy rooms! Talking about sexual concerns, issues and problems can be incredibly difficult. Finding accurate information in this age of information overload is a challenge. Finding a safe space to raise sexual desires, fears and worries is often almost impossible. As a sex coach and psychotherapist, I offer a safe place from which to explore. Each week I will delve into a topic from the realm of sex, intimacy and relationships. No subject is taboo! I will draw my topics from my own areas of interest, 30 years’ experience seeing clients, and topics sent in by you! I will have special guests who will discuss debate and advice on areas from first sexual experiences to all varieties of kinky sex to serial monogamy to dealing with sexually transmitted disease. I’ll answer those questions you have found it too embarrassing to ask, address the nitty gritty in down to earth language. To find out more and connect with me, head on over to my website at www.the-intimacy-coach.com.

About your host

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Lori Beth Bisbey

Dr Lori Beth Bisbey® is a psychologist, sex & intimacy coach, speaker, author & podcast host who has been working with people for 30+ years to help them create and maintain meaningful relationships with sizzling sex (without the shame). She has expertise in the treatment of trauma and GSRD (gender, sex, relationship diversity). The A to Z of Sex® (her main podcast) has been running since October 2016. Since end January 2019, it has been featured on the Health & Wellness channel, Voiceamerica.com.